Finality. So this is it, back in Canada. We’ve been back about three weeks and I am struggling to write and digest so much of the past eight months.
I don’t want to trivialize with summaries and photos. I want the whole story to be told. I don’t want to perpetuate the myth of Africa, it is not my story to tell. I want to share but am conscious of boring people. I also want to scream at friends who talk of broken dishwashers and car insurance and how much is too much to spend on a new pair of shoes.
I feel as if I can’t relate.
London: a blur, a noiseless vaccum of black clothes, round shoes, hollow faces and seeming order. Crying children everywhere.
Toronto: Canadian flags, more order, confusion over the simplicity of access to banks, food, communication. Bored. Claustrophobic. CN Tower disgusts me.
Nova Scotia: So many trees, colours and drinkable air. Walks in the forest with Mabel. Family warmth.
Calgary: rodeo wedding. A young girl carries the Canadian flag on horseback while the national anthem plays. I sing along and feel tears in my eyes. Good food and company make the stories and pictures from Ghana easier to digest.
Kumasi, LUV FM, tro-tro rides, fufu and goats all seem very far away right now; physically and emotionally. The world of a month ago and reality are so different and reconciling the two is impossible. Time and certainty over the next step in our lives will no doubt bring reality closer into focus. For now, I remain nostalgic for Ghana, or rather the randomness, the spontaneity and craziness of it all.